catiecake.

I want to kiss you all over and over again.

Dear Kittens,

I fell behind on the thing I invented where I post photos AND words together at the same time! I'm so sorry. Here's a quick catch up-

Here's my new hair:

I love the haircut. I do not especially care for the red highlights. The main reason for me to get highlights is because the minimal damage the highlights cause adds some body to my hair. I don't care for how they look, but I don't hate them either. It's just not how I want to look anymore, you know?

I had an assignment that was to show signs of fall in my neighborhood. There are other signs, but this is mine:

A wet sidewalk with some fallent leaves and an orange cat.

I thought you should know what I'm eating most mornings for breakfast these days. A 2 egg omelet with red peppers a dash of cheddar, tea and an apple on the side.

And now I've got to get my day going. I slept in because I had the fleece blanket of coziness on my bed. That blanket makes everything better and it makes you sleep way longer than you ever thought you would.

I kiss you!
Catie

Pink bike!

Dear Kittens,

I know how obsessed you Kittens are with my hair and so I will tell you that the cut is different and while the highlights are way more obvious than I wanted, they do look pretty. I will take a photo tomorrow for you to look at. The best thing about my hair is that I'vee got a bunch of layers and I can pretty much replicate my hair from my 9th grade school photo as seen here: (my hair now is much shorter)

I haven't been feeling that great this week, which is irritating. I am pretty certain it's all about what I've been eating. My choices haven't been the worst in the world, but they aren't the best, either. I really need to get back into the swing of cooking regularly and what not, I just haven't been feeling it. Maybe I should get back into cooking by inventing another theme week of dinners. Remember when I did the week of salads? That was so tasty and fun! Maybe a week of soups?

I am so tired. I really want to go to bed very early tonight. For a long time I thought that 7.5 hours was enough for me, but now I'm thinking that I need at least 8 and maybe even 8.5. Believe me, I am shocked by this, but when I get 7.5 I'm good for 2 days, but by day 3 I am really tired and headachey and complainy.

Also, this is really reaching to include one more photo, but can you believe that I have not been on my bike at all this year? NOT EVEN ONCE! That is clearly not acceptable. Look at it. It's pink and has a basket and had Hello Kitty Face tread. I mean what sort of ingrate am I. Well, let me tell you what, Kittens- I am riding my bike all fall! Except in the rain and or wind. I do not like wind and obviously you do not ride a pink bike in the rain.

Kittens, as I previously mentioned, I am so tired and so now I'm going to watch It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia and then I'm going to brush my teeth, wash my face, apply various European youth vita spheres to my face and then go bed. T

he End,

Catie

(I love you)

And now you get to see a small sampling of my favorite photos of our kitty cats.

Dear Kittens,

Man, getting up when it's dark SUCKS BIG HAIRY ASS. I feel very sorry for you people who have to do it every day because of your job. Even if you love your job, it is not good to wake up in the darks. I'm struggling today, Kittens. I do not want to walk. It's a beautifully crisp morning and what I would really love to do is to sleep in until about 8 am and then have my (imaginary) spa boy, Clive Owens, come over and bathe me and massage me and fetch Starbucks for me and then make me a very healthy breakfast and put me down for a nap. Yes. I would like to go back to my newborn baby schedule. Except without the crying.

Yesterday's Life Coach meeting went very well. She had me do this exercise that I resisted for a long time. She wanted me to write out my life story. I didn't want to do it. It kept coming up and finally I just did it and e mailed her and then she told me all these things about life that made me sound so totally awesome! When it's your life you just see these things as details, but when someone else reads it, they're like Awesome #1, Awesome #2, etc. It's one thing for your friends to be all, hey- we like you. But when someone knows the facts of your life and says, here is exactly where you are awesome it's a very nice feeling. Kittens, you are just babies and so maybe you don't understand this, but sometimes when you are approaching a birthday that begins with a whole new number it's gets a little difficult to see your greatness. Mostly you see the areas in which aren't so great and you lament how you life coulda/shoulda/woulda been so much better if you had just followed that plan your 10 year old self had laid out for you.

I am making and official declaration. Wednesday is Treat Day! Today is the day you do something really nice for yourself. It can be anything that makes you feel good and happy and you know, treated. For me it's going to mean a trip to Starbucks to get some delicious iced tea and a trip to the art supply store where I will spend no more than $40 on supplies that I don't exactly "need", but will all the same make me feel energized and excited about creating something new.

Today I'm getting my hair done. I'm schedule for highlights, but I feel like I'm doing them more for my hair girl than for me. Here's my problem, I see people with highlights and exactly 8/10 of them look so dated and awful that it makes me not want to participate. My instructions to my girl today will be to make them TINY and SUBTLE and practically invisible and then I think it will be my last time highlighting for a while. Also, I would probably like to change my haircut, but my super sonically straight hair is really a pain in neck because it's is super sonically straight, which is code for very straight and no body whatsoever. You know that hair you had when you were 4? I still have that hair.

Today is talk like a pirate day and I am not participating. Mostly because I think it zooms right past silly and dives head first into stupid. And also, I don't really want to encourage the idea of pirates being cute and charming. You know, like Coca Cola has done with one of the most viscious, brutal mammals on the planet? The Polar Bear. There, I party pooped on your pirate party and also on your polar bear obsession. You can thank me  later.

Love,

Catie 

Waiting for the sun

Dear Kittens,

1. Since I am back in the mode of exercising regularly right now that means getting up before the sun. I woke up a little earlier than usual and now I'm waiting until it gets more light out. I have this crazy issue of wanting to see where I'm going. I love going to bed early and getting up early. My farmer genes are quite strong apparently and this is the sort of schedule and works best for me. I almost always wake up in a good mood and ready to get started. The mornings right now are extra crisp and I love that, too.

2. I've been reading a lot of Kent Haruf lately and am developing a crush on the plain states. This has happened before. When an author loves where he/she lives and it's often a character in their books, I find it impossible to not to start to fall in love with the landscapes they describe. First it was Ellen Gilchrist and the south. Despite the fact that I've never visited the south, I know I would love it because it plays such a huge roll in some of my favorite books. Then it was EM Forrester's Italy. Now it's Kent Haruf's Colorado and the plain states.

3. The thing where I don't nag my husband anymore? It's going pretty well. I admit to some minor tongue injuries while not saying certain things, but over all it's a weight lifted from me. It's not that things don't irritate me, because they do, it's that I'm just not saying anything. The relief it brings me comes from the re-realization that I am not the boss. It's not my job to be sure that Andy is doing his job. It's my job to take care of my stuff and believe that Andy is capable of taking care of his stuff. I know that sometimes women marry men who are completely unwilling to participate in the day to day upkeep of a life. I am pretty certain that my vagina would instantly seal up in that sort of a situation, but maybe I'm wrong. Alls I know is, this is working out well for both of us right now.

4. Tuesdays are my life coach days. This time around, our agenda is being drive by me and that's good. I'm not sure if I'll continue past these 12 weeks, except for periodic check ins, though. I am moving forward in a way that feels very good and not all herky jerky like before. One very positive thing Life Coach had me so was set boundaries for myself. As in- how bad does something have to get before you do something about it. I've found it very helpful to put boundaries like that on myself. I set boundaries for my house (if it is going to take more than an hour to make my house company ready, I need to stop everything and clean up), for exercise (if it's been more than a week since I last exercised, I get started) and so on.

5. Wow, I started this 14 hours ago! And now I officially have nothing to say. Except that I'm ready for bed and it feels chilly and there's nothing better than sleeping with the windows better when it's chilly.

Love,

Catie Anchev

Catie to the stars. 

Breeana turns 13

Dear Kittens,

The whole reason we went out on the lake this weekend was to celebrate our niece's 13th birthday. Long time readers will remember when I would call her Miss Banana Face because that's how she said her name (Breeana Faith). For a long time she was my sidekick as we roamed the mall, bookstores and parks around San Jose. Once she started school, I would pick her up on Tuesday afternoons and we would hang out. In those days Breeana would talk and talk and talk and talk and man alive it could make a person want to drive into brick wall. I made the rule that there was no talking in the car unless she was bleeding or getting ready to die. On her own accord she started raising her hand in the back seat whenever she wanted to say something. We would make eye contact in the rear view mirror and she would say, "but Aunt Catie, I just have something I need to tell you". Which, you know, is cute, but I stuck to the rule mostly because she's very wiley and if you gave her and inch she would take 14 miles.

When we would get to wherever we were going she would tell me whatever very important thing she had to say. Breeana struck up conversations with anyone. For a long time they started like this, "Hi, my name is Breeana. B-R-E-E-A-N-A." Back in those days she had issues saying her R's and she sounded like she had a Boston accent. It's almost hard to remember her talking like that because she self-corrected in kindergarten.

When my sister and her family moved away it took me a long time to adjust to not having Breeana or Jared hanging out with me at least once a week. I was so used to scheduling around them that once I didn't have to do that I kept thinking I was forgetting something important.

She's always been really funny and smart, but nowadays she's got a lot of grace. She's super good to her little brother, she's helpful and articulate and curious and really just a wonderful girl. You know, we love her and think we're pretty lucky to have someone like her in our lives.

Love,

Cate 

A Week in photos.

Dear Kittens,

I've had full and fun weekend and I am completely exhausted. I've been endeavoring to come up with a good schedule for myself that allows me to be productive, but doesn't forget the fact that I like a good amount of unscheduled time in which I can be an artiste. The absolutely most important part of that is going to bed early. I'm of the opinion that pretty much everything that's wrong with you is due to sleep deprivation. Unless, of course, you get plenty of good quality sleep, then you need to exercise. I haven't been great about getting to bed on time, but tonight I am back on the wagon. I am recommited. I am large and in charge when it comes to going to bed early. Woo Hoo! Early bedtime.

Here's something else, I'm making a pledge to you reading Kittens that says I will post every day this week. And! Each post will be accompanied by a photo. Can you even imagine it? I know, it's like a party around here all the time. I mean because you are just baby kittens, I try to keep it lowkey because I don't want anyone to stroke out.

So today, I present to you, some photos of my brother-in-law jumping off a bridge. Your tax dollars went towards training this man to do things like this. He served as a Marine, so he's like a professional at doing remarkably dangerous things.

You're so pretty,
Catie

Don't Spam me. I will cut you. (Although I kept typing "cute" instead of "cut" so whatever)

Dear Kittens,

I can't exactly remember when we got our first computer, but I know it was in the early 90's. I think it was about 10 minutes after we first got online that we received our first piece of spam e mail. I mention all this only to make the point, that truly I should be over it. I'm really not bothered that much by spam that I receive from strangers. It's nothing personal. Typically it's easy enough to identify spam and you usually don't even have to open it to know that it should be automatically deleted.

The spam that I cannot wrap my brain around is the type your "family" sends you. I have a cousin who e mails me at least once a week with some little nugget of bullshit. An e mail with several animated graphics of cartoony animals hugging, advice about how to always have a good day and my all time favorite is the threatening ones. The ones that say, send this e mail to 10 people in the next 10 minutes OR YOU AND EVERYONE YOU LOVE WILL DIE!!!!!!!! Always with the multiple exclamation points. Why would you send something like to anyone? Also- the "inspirational" or whatever stories? Guess what? I do not give a shit. I'm one hard assed broad and I am not inspired by some sappy piece of shit story in freaking mass e mail. I haven't done this yet, but I'm on the verge of asking her to cease and desist with the mother fucking e mail.

I have a bunch of things to tell you today, Kittens. I hope you're settled in.

1. Oil of Olay Regenerist eye stuff is so very awesome. I was hesitant to buy it because it's a tiny bottle and I may have been harboring the idea that unless something is expensive it's not going to be any good. Firstly, you don't even need a whole pump of this stuff to take care of your eyes. Secondly, it's inexpensive and works beautifully!

2. Arm & Hammer's whitening toothpaste is awesome! I love that's not it's overly sweet and it truly does a very good job whitening.

3. Whole Foods is selling these ginger cookies that are huge and chewy and taste like ginger brownies. They are so delicious that I went out of my way (not by much) to get some more today.

4. It's been my experience that when you allow a creative type person to do their things you will have a much better result than if you put a bunch of restrictions on said creative person. For example, my hair girl knows my limitations- I like a bob, I do not like bangs. Inside that bob/no bang parameter, she's allowed to do whatever she wants. Every week my nail girl asks if I want a flower on my toes and every week I say sure! I let her do whatever she wants mostly because I don't really care what's on my toes and every since I told her to do whatever she wanted to, I've been getting really cute and unique designs. Also, my website girl is the same way. I give her very little input because I trust her aesthetic totally. She has never once disappointed me.

5. I have completely given up nagging. No more. Done and also done. My new policy is that I will ask/remind/inform one time and after that I'm letting it go. I had my nagging under control for a while, but it's gotten bad again and I realize I really hate my nagging self. It doesn't feel good to be a nag and I can't imagine it feels good to be nagged. I've had to literally bite my tongue several  times since I made this decision (Monday), but it's worth it. Because already I feel better. I don't know how Andy feels, and really while it's absolutely better for my marriage that I don't nag, I'm doing this more for myself than for him.

6. I was organizing my jewelry box the other day and I found two silver bracelets that I used to wear all the time. One was from this kid I was friends with in 5th and 6th grade. His name was/is Steve Albers and he gave me his ID bracelet. STEVE is engraved on the front of it. We weren't boyfriend and girlfriend or anything ridiculous like that, just friends. It's really not like to me to keep something like this, but I have.  The other silver bracelet was one among many that I bought during one of my many visits to Mexico as a kid. I'm not sure how old it is, but at least 25 years and I've started wearing it again. I sort of want to wear the Steve bracelet too. I hesitated at first because obviously my husband's name is not Steve, but as I'm writing this out now, why shouldn't I wear it? Who cares?

7. It turns out I don't have that much to tell you. Except that I love you and you're pretty and I think you look like you've lost weight.

With Love,
Catie

The Beginning of The Anchevs

Dear Kittens,

I'm so excited about my new space. It feels all fresh and new and not at all like I'm going to write the same of things I've been writing for the last almost 8 years.

First, since I am still in a "back to the beginning" sort of mood, I will tell you about how Andy and I came to be a family. The story we tell everyone is that we met through a mutual friend. Mostly that's true and since this blog has my real name attached to it, that's the story we're sticking to. When we met, I was living in nothern California with my parents, doing hair in Davis, California. Andy lived in Westchester county, living with his parents working in NYC with his dad. We started exchanging handwritten letters. At first I was totally annoyed by Andy. He was sort of pushy and wanted to quiz me about my political beliefs and what books I read and oi! Annoying!

Somewhere along the lines the letters started to get more personal and we got to know each other better. Then in March 1989 Andy and I were on the phone and I said, "I think I have a crush on you" and he said, "oh, because I'm totally in love with you". I said, "you cannot say that!" and he said, "I said it!" That began the romantic part of our relationship. Andy would write me several pages of handwritten love letters with a fountain pen that he dipped in purple ink (at the time purple was my favorite color). This continued for several months until we decided that we absolutely had to meet. I know! Up until this point, we'd never spent any physical time together. Just phone calls and letters.

We met August of 1989. Andy came to California and we spent a week together. It was an okay week, but mostly we just noticed all the ways we weren't right for each other. At the end of the week, I dropped him off at the airport and then cried all the way to my aunt's house (I was getting together with family for some reason- I don't remember why). Andy called me from his layover in Detroit and we both cried and said we didn't want to be broken up. We wanted to be together. WAH!

Then began the visiting back and forth. Andy came to see me in October. Then I went to visit him (and meet his family) for New Year's. That was a DISASTROUS visit. It's safe to say that Andy's parents were less than thrilled about me and they made that very obvious. I was almost 22 years old and it was the first time anyone (besides my dad) had been truly unkind to me. After the horrible dinner with Andy's family (they completely ignored me, refused to speak English and were generally dismissive) Andy and I took the train back into NYC where we were staying. I cried and cried and cried on the trainride. It was New Year's Eve 1989-90 and I remember how everyone would stop and look at Andy, like he was the most horrible person to make his girl cry on New Year's Eve. The rest of that visit was v. romantic. I had endure a little bit more time with Andy's family, but that was brief and then we were just alone.

Sometime in February 1990 we decided that we wanted to live together and the deal was that we would first live in California together then in two years we would move to NYC to live there. Thinking back this was a pretty stupid plan, but it's what we both agreed to. After living together for a few months and the situation with Andy's family only getting worse, I said, "you know I'm not moving to NYC, right?" He said that he did know and that he thought it was unfair and really and truly that's the last time we talked about it.

We were engaged after living together for 2 years. We got married a year after that in a tiny church that sat atop a tiny hill in a tiny coastal town in nothern California. It was a sweet wedding and while I would love to take a time machine ride and go back and change certain things, I wouldn't want to change who I married and so I can live with the rest. Oh! At our wedding Andy's parents finally decided that since I probably wasn't going anywhere they should just go ahead and accept me and that relationship improved greatly.

In 1995 we moved from southern California to west San Jose and we've in this part of town ever since.

Andy is the most wonderful person I've ever met (although, I married him because he's good in bed, the wonderfulness is just a bonus) and my life is a good place because he's in it.

Big Love, Catie

Dear Kittens,

If you are new to this blog, you will notice that I use a lot of numbered lists in my writing. I also go from subject to subject without warning. Stay close, you don't want to miss a thing.

I do not understand Daylight Saving Time or Standard time or why we switch or why when we switch has been changed. Alls I know is that I'm ready for the time to change back because at least for a little while, it would mean that I wasn't taking my walk in the dark and that would be good.

Yesterday a woman came to the door passing out flyers for missing kids. Talking about how many children were kidnapped every year and look at her badge, which proves she's authentic. I ended up looking at the badge for a really long time and thinking that the badge meant she had a badge. Not that she truly belonged to any sort of organization. When I said something to that effect she was startled and didn't really know what to say. Then I really lowered the boom. I told her that I didn't buy into this whole "kidnapped" kid thing and while there was no doubt in my mind that these kids had undoubtedly been taken from one parent by another parent, to call them "missing" or talking "kidnapping" in a way that suggests that every day millions of children are snatched up my strangers is wholly irresponsible and that I would never support an organization who did that. She sputtered for a second and then left. I should definitely stop answering my door during the day.

Saturday my sister and her family are coming over so we can celebrate Breenana's 13 (!) birthday on the boat. We're going to the lake for some zooming around and then we're coming back to our place to do a Mexican style grill. I'm looking forward to it all.

Every year since we've had the boat I think it would be awesome if we took the boat out on the lake in the fall. Mostly because I think it would be beautiful and peaceful. I'm realizing now that we don't ever end up doing that because fall turns out to be an exceedingly busy time of year. Already October is completely booked.

I just reminded myself of something funny. A very long time ago Andy and I were in Rhode Island with my parents at a dinner celebrating Andy's sister's first marriage. The new in-laws wanted to come over to Andy's parents house for breakfast the next morning and my mother-in-law was hesitating agreeing. She wanted to sleep in, they wanted to get going early- it was a dilemma. So my father-in-law says, "Yes! Come for breakfast. It will be good." And my mother-in-law shoots him a look like, "WTF, Homey?" And then, in a fit of pure genius, my father-in-law turns to Danny (my step-dad) and says, "You (meaning the man) must set the tone (with the little woman)." And everyone who heard it started laughing so hard no one could breathe. A little bit you have to know my in-laws to appreciate the ridiculousness of such a statement. Ever since then it's become a joke in my family.

In closing I would like to tell you that Andy and I have put ourselves on an allowance schedule. It hasn't been fine tuned yet, but we're using those Visa Buxx cards designed for teens, to dole out the money. We decided that our allowance money would be for "non-essentials". This descision has meant there's all manner of dicussion over what is the difference between essential and non essential items. We're defining what is non-essentials for ourselves, but it's been pretty jokey lately about what counts and what doesn't. For right now all my regular skincare stuff and basics of makeup are essentials. Extras like new lipsticks and eye shadows are not. Books and CDs are non-essentials and however sad it makes me to say this, so do shoes. Unless I'm buying a new pair of shoes to walk in, that is. Haircuts are essential, manicures and pedicures are not. And so on until it makes you feel like crying.

Now it's time to finish up designing the Christmas cards I plan on selling this year. Yesterday was a very bad card day. None of my sassy ideas ended up working out. It's very annoying when that happens.

Love,

Catie

Back to the beginning.

Dear Kittens,

So, I've had this space since last October, but I'm finally going live with it. I'm finally leaving Diaryland. It feels borderline traumatic, but of course it isnt. It's just a new place for my diary and while I know leaving Diaryland will make difficult for some of you to keep up with me, I hope you'll make the effort. And if you don't then I'll put you on my list of people who I don't like. Your choice, Kittens.

Since this is my first post at a new place I feel compelled to start with some history. I started so-called bloggin December 1999 at Diaryland. I've deleted most of my archives. I' not the sort of person who savs old love letters or birthday cards or anything like that and blog posts are pretty much the same thing to me. I keep stuff around for a little while, then everything gets deleted.

I'm married to a guy that I really like. His name is Andy, he's Bulgarian. We got married in 1993 in Mendocino, California. Our wedding was small and sweet and even though it was a long time ago people still tell us how much fun they had, which is nice. We live in west San Jose and we love it. We've lived here since 1995 and I can't imagine us leaving for a very long time. We bought a house in 2005 and we're slowly fixing it up.

We live with three cats. Roo, who we got in November 1990. We found him through an ad in the paper (we lived in Redondo Beach at the time). The guy who ran the add brough Roo to our house in a cardboard cat carrier strapped to his motorcycle. Roo was so little, his whole self fit in my hand. The fur along his spine stuck up like a little mohawk and the stripes on his belly looked like they could be his skeleton. Roo is very pretty any very grouchy.

Petey came to live with us in September 2000. We lived in an apartment at the time and one morning there was this little fluffy black kitten meowing at our screen door. I picked him up and took him downstairs to see who he belonged to. Our drug dealing neighbor's skanky girlfriend told me that I couldn't have that kitten because he was her's. Over the next couple days I noticed that kitten spent most of his time up on the second floor (where we lived) asleep. There was no food or water out for him and he never ran around playing. He was listless and sad looking. One day the kids that lived in the apartment building told me they thought the kitty was dead. I went to investigate. He wasn't dead, but he was dehydrated, hungry and covered in fleas. I fed and watered him. I brushed out his fluffy fur, made a little bed for him and kept an eye out. The next evening I was coming home late from a date with a friend and the drug dealing assholes had that kitten and they were blowing pot smoke into his fluffy black face. That was the final straw for me, so the next morning I catnapped him, brought him into our apartment, bathed him and promised Andy and Roo that I would not keep him. Two days later I named him Petey and he's been kneading my left boob every day since then.

Seamus has been living with us since Memorial Day weekend 2005. He showed up at the house we were renting, looking cute, skinny, dirty and hungry. I opened a can of cat food for him and he wolfed it down in less than a minute. He hung around. The next day I told Andy, Roo and Petey that he would just be an outside cat. Three days later he was sleeping on our bed like it was his to begin with and we've never looked back. Well, *I've* never looked back. He goes on walks with me pretty much every day and he's got the cutest face and best personality of any cat I've ever known. Plus, he's orange.

I have a business wherein I made gretting cards and other crafty bits for sale. It's a one woman show and even though I joke about the cats chipping it, it really is a joke. They are no help, at all. I'm grateful for my sweet set up. Being "busy" holds no interest for me. I like to be productive and I like to live my life at a slower pace.

I like to spend time with my parents (my mom and step-dad). They're wonderful people and we have a great time together.

I use the services of a life coach. She's pretty awesome. You can check out her website

You are loved,

Catie