catiecake.

Walls

Dear Kittens,

1. It was supposed to rain for most of the week, but it didn't! And that means I was able to walk the dog a lot. Two walks a day and each time Murray is behaving so nicely. And we're meeting new people. Tonight we met Joe and Karen. They were very nice about Murray excitedly peeing on their driveway.

2. My Kindle arrived a day early and I downloaded a bunch of pretend books and then started reading them. Oh man, I love it. At first I was't totally sure how much I would love it and then I was like- what I'm some manner of moron? Of course I love it! It's really nice to be reading again.

3. Andy was forced to take 5 unpaid days off this quarter and he decided to 5 three day weekends. While that's super nice, it totally messes with my concept of what day it is. Tomorrow is, apparently, Friday. I'm thinking about going to IKEA, which may or may not be a mistake, but could include getting a lobster roll, which means no matter what it would not be a mistake. I don't know. IKEA is so tricky. Going by myself is risky. I could pass out or die or something and how long would it take for them to find me in that maze?

4. Band practice across the street has started up again. They suck more than ever! This makes me hate these neighbors. I was going to say they are nice people and then I realized that nice people would not let their moronic teenage kid have (bad) band practice in the garage after 9 pm.

5. I started uses this magical serum from Perscriptives a couple of weeks ago and I totally love it. It's got a horrible name, as most of these things do.Super  Line Preventer Xtreme. I mean, come on. Why not just name it Magical Serum? Anyway, this stuff is great and my skin looks awesome and so I will use it every single day until I decide that I hate it. I also love Philosophy's cleanser called Purity. That stuff is awesome. My skin feels clean and soft, not dry and tight or weirdly oily like with other cleansers I've used.

6. And now I go to the bed and I sleep like the dead. Thank you.

Love,

Catie

Where is the good doctor now?

Dear Kittens,

1. I haven't been taking photos lately. I blame the rain, but the truth is I've just gotten lazy about it. I'd like to take my camera with me when I walk with Murray, maybe I try that tomorrow on our short walk and see how it goes.

2. I felt sick all day yesterday. I just felt really crappy. And then at midnight-thirty I threw up and instantly felt better. I went back to sleep and woke up feeling great. Like I invented feeling great. It's almost worth feeling sick, that great feeling, you know?

3. The progress on my office is going well. It's amazing how easy it is now that I have a real vision for what I want for this space. Every day I put 30-45 minutes into working on it and that's the perfect amount of time. I get plenty done, but I don't get overwhelmed or bored.

4. Even though I am not particularly religious, I do enjoy observing Lent. It's an opportunity to be more mindful and the timing always seems right- so I Lent it up. In addition to saying the rosary every night, I'm going to do the traditional Catholic thing of not eating meat on Friday. That not eating meat is going to be difficult mostly because I will need to remember. Oh! I will use my fancy iPhone to remind me.

5. In two days I am supposed to get my Kindle. If it does not arrive I will cry and cry and cry.

6. I've got nothing else. I just want to wash my face and brush my teeth and get in the bed.

Love,

Catie

Nine Things Super Fast

Dear Kittens,

1. Several really great days in a row! Yay for great days in a row.

2. I am not watching a second of the Oscars and this thrills me.

3. I went to Target today and got a new makeup bag because my old one, while super cute, is not working for me anymore.

4. My eyes hurt from too much computer, iPhone and TV.

5. Rain. Rain. Rain.

6. As per usual, I am tryng to stay on an early schedule. WHY IS THIS SO HARD?

7. I love walking with my dog.

8. I have been so super good about putting stuff away! This feels like a huge triumph.

9. I have decided to get back into cooking. Go team!

Love,
Catie

Faster Lighting

Dear Kittens,

1. Being a source of love in the world is not that easy because people are all the time PURPOSELY making it difficult on you. Take, for example, the teenage shitball that came to my door yesterday selling some shit. I have my mom on the phone and my dog freaking out and I have to pee and he goes into his deal and so I say, "listen, this is a very difficult time for me, so instead of wasting your time, let's just cut to the chase. I'm not going to buy whatever it is that you're selling." And instead of just walking away he says, "oh BUY is the last thing I'll say to you." And I went, "awesome" and shut the door. I shouldn't have answered the door at all and right now I am working on a no solicitors sign. Because I am done with people coming to my door asking me to join their church, buy their magazines or whatever else.

2. Today was much better than yesterday. It was a good puppy day, which makes all the difference for me. One thing I love about our dog trainer is that he's there for questions whenever we have them. He gave me some excellent advice yesterday, as did Andy and today was good. One thing Andy told me that is that I was too caught up in following the rules and I was not reading the dog. That was hard to hear, but it was true. I can get VERY wrapped up in the rules of a thing and lose sight of the big picture.

3. Before we bought this house we LOVED to watch HGTV. After we bought the house all those shows about do-it-yourself renovations and claims of walls just needing one coat of paint pissed us off and we lost interest. I have't watched HGTV in three years. Before we got a dog I loved watching Cesar Millan's show. Now? Not so much. I tell you one other truth. I don't think puppies are all that cute anymore. I see a puppy and I think. Gah! That's a lot of work right there. Kittens, however, I still love to bits.

4. I got an iPhone for my birthday. I am very happy with it, but if Andy didn't have the iPhone before me- I probably would've been horribly disappointed. Firstly, it's function as a phone is really not that awesome. It's function as a super fun toy? A++ My favorite thing is the Scrabble game. Andy and I both downloaded it and as long as we're on the same network, we can play each other. It's a lot of fun.

5. For as long as I've had an office, it has been an issue for me. I've gotten very close, several times, to getting it all organized, but it manages to get all junked up in no time. I have finally come to the conclusion it's because I do not know how to use that space. It ends up being a catchall for everything. That's no good. This time, I'm coming at this project in an entirely different way. I'm getting rid of everything single thing in there that has nothing to do with creating my stuff. And then everything else is going into clear, plastic, well labeled boxes. You know who loves me? The Container Store, that's who. I figure this will take me about a week. I'ma start tomorrow.

Eep! it's really late.

Love,
Catie

You're more than one thing

Dear Kittens,

1. I turned 41 last Thursday. This aging thing is really not horrible except for the necessity of expensive skincare products. Well, necessary if you don't want to look like a grizzled old bag.

2. I think I mentioned before that I think of my birthday as the start of my personal year and I like to have some sort of goal for the year that I strive towards. After giving it a lot of thought I've decided that I want to put my energy towards three areas in my life this year.

a) Absolute integrity. I want my actions, thoughts and intentions to match my values as perfectly as possible. I do okay with this, but there is room for improvement. Maybe even a lot of room. I just want to keep it super duper real.

b) Increase physical strength. I used to be so strong! And now I am not! So back to the weight bench. I love lifting weights, so I'm excited about recommitting to this.

c) Be a source of love. Oh, I know- you feel like you just got a giant whiff of patchouli. I want to make the effort to reach out more, be there more and support more. I'm a lucky woman because I have a lot of really wonderful friends and I don't always think I am the greatest friend in return, so I work to fix that.

3. Murray News- we've started private dog training and it's going really well! I admit to having a crush on the dog trainer because he's making our relationship with our dog a lot better. We're using Bay Area Dog Training and Mike Hatjes is our trainer. He is so patient and kind and truly loving in his approach to dog (people) training. What's awesome is how Murray reacts to Mike. Murray understands very quickly that this guy is not a dog moron (like us) and will not be putting up with any puppy ideas of dominance. We would totally have this guy's octuplets, if he wanted us to. Maybe we just go ahead and do it as a surprise.

4. Last week was the weird and wonderful and I'm really glad that it's done.

5. First I tell you about the weird. 8 years ago I ended my relationship with my dad. Many long time readers will remember all that stuff. On Tuesday he shows up at my door unannounced and uninvited. I was not surprised, I knew eventually he would do this. We spent the afternoon together and while it was happening it went okay. I admit that I wasn't thinking. I was in some sort of automatic mode and that shit did not serve me well at all. The very next day I felt horrible. I was so regretful. I kept replaying things he said and I was right back where I was 8 years ago. That was not comfortable. In fact, it was a nice little trip down Self-Loathing Lane and it turns out- I didn't miss that place one bit! My dad is who my dad is and to expect him to change in any meaningful way. I know that he might be able manage being good to me for a certain period of time and then his jealousy over my life would take over and he would go back to his normal, cruel self. I'm done with all that. I won't make this mistake ever again.

6. The wonderful was my aunt and 2 cousins who I've not seen in a long time came by for a visit. My hope that Murray would bring more people into our lives has absolutely come true. This dog is a people magnet. It was really great to see them and we had such a nice time.

7. Today has kicked my ass. I would like for today to go screw itself and NOT IN A GOOD WAY. Tuesday- you can suck it. I hate your guts.

8. I think I mentioned that I have not really read a single thing since we got Murray. But, very soon I will get my KINDLE and I will be reading all the time. Right? Boy, I hope so because I miss reading. I'm super excited about the Kindle.

9. I'm growing part of my hair out a little bit and it is SO ANNOYING. You have no idea. Kittens, you just need to be brushed from time to time, you do not understand how awful it is to have to grow out your hair because you momentarily went stupid and decided to get bangs. So for right now I'm going around looking like a...I don't even know what.

Here's to Wednesday, which HAS to be a better day.

Love,
Catie

Dear Kittens,

1. Hello Rain. Please fill our reservoirs quickly and do not cause any other problems. THX! 

2. It just occured to me that Andy and I are in crisis management mode, but we really need to switch to This Is Our Life Mode. The company Andy works for was acquired by another company late last year. That coincided with landing a very big customer and so things have been extremely busy for Andy. Also, we got a puppy. Have I mentioned that? Anyway- Andy's been saying, "this is just a bad week" for the last 6 weeks and I think it's time we up our game.

3. I'm a big fan of a book called You Can Be Happy No Matter What by Richard Carlson. The basic premise is that circumstances are always going to make things difficult, but you don't have to let your circumstance decide your happiness. No matter what's going on, happiness is always an available choice. I won't speak for Andy, but I'm ready to start choosing it again.

4. This means going back to my basics. Getting on a schedule that I love, taking the dog for plenty of walks (speaking of which, who are these people who do not pick up their dog's poop? There was a tremendous amount of poop on the sidewalks and in the edges of people's yards yesterday) and eating super delicious, vegetable rich meals.

5. The across the street neighbor's son has recently formed a band. And they practice in the garage. They are practicing right now! Even though it past 10 pm! And they don't really play songs, they just jam and it's very jarring to listen to. I am on the verge of complaining, but I half wonder- no one else is bothered by this fucked up "music"? Also, they practice during the day AND at night. It's awesome. Not.

6. Sometimes I still get really sad about Petey's death. Today at the vet's office someone asked after me and how I was doing with the grief and I almost started crying. When she saw the look on my face she started apologizing which just made me even more teary. I was downloading a bunch of videos from my Flip camera and there is one short one of Petey kneading me and that hit me sort of hard. Most of the time, I'm fine, though.

7. I'm going to bed right this second! I want to be asleep before 11 pm.

Love,

Catie

Citrus

Dear Kittens,

1. My Internet ladies arrived on Friday and left on Monday. It was an intense weekend of too much drinking and not enough sleeping and a lot of fun. I wish that we all lived close enough to be a part of each other's lives on a regular basis. We're a diverse group of women with varied interests which makes get togethers a lot of fun.

2. I was really worried about how Murray would be with a houseful of ladies, but it went well! He made me look like a total liar by being well behaved. I was so relieved.

3. My 41st birthday is next week and I am mentally preparing for it. Getting older does not bug me as much as I thought it would, but I do think of my birthday as the start of my personal year and I like to think about how I'd like the year to go. I haven't had any real inspiration yet, but I will keep you posted.

4. Life with a puppy has it's ups and downs. We've met several Wheaten owners that the conseus without exception is that You Must Be Firm and unfortunately for us firm often feels mean. But we notice that when we're what seems like hard to us to Murray he does better. This is exactly why we are so excited to be starting dog training.

5. Since we got Murray, almost a month ago, I have not read a single sentence in a single book. Not a single sentence! I do feel like I have more breathing room nowadays and so I will get back to it. During my ladies' weekend there was a book exchange and I scored a couple of books, so maybe I start with those. One of them is tiny.

6. Our only plans this weekend is to meet with the dog trainer Saturday afternoon. This is good news because I am itching to do a house project. I only have 1 million to choose from, but the one calling to me the most is the worst one- the GARAGE. Right now, if you go into my garage there is every chance I will never see you again. The thing is- there is actually plenty of storage space in the garage, we're just not using it very well. We have a bunch of stuff for donation, a bunch more to go to the dump and then just all our regular stuff that needs to be organized. Eventually we want to finish the garage, but for right now I would settle for the garage being tidy and organized.

7. I may have mentioned this before, but my weakness is serving dishes. Platters, bowls, trays, tiny dishes, dishes with compartments, teired trays and so on. I love them all so much. I just got myself a square lucite tray. I didn't buy it with a specific intention, but I can think of a bunch of uses for it. I could just carry it around like a baby. Maybe I get a snugli for it. I could load it up with my breakfast and then eat it in bed. I could put my cat on it. I could use it as a weapon, if necessary.

8. I have a friend coming for a quick overnight visit and I really need to get the guestroom in order!

9. And maybe I should do some laundry, too!

 

Love,

Catie