catiecake.

Fourth of November

Dear Kittens,

The flea market today was disappointing. I managed to buy a gorgeous glass footed compote bowl and an empty picture frame. I've got quite the collection of serveware going. I should have a party or something.

Today was good because I was outside, with my mom and I was walking. It felt really good to get away from the house and do something completely unrelated to my work. I truly love what I do, but the last week has been extremely stressful for me (my own fault) and getting away was good. Speaking of which- all of my holiday stuff is up. Cards, artwork (makes a great gift), ornaments and stockings. www.catiecake.com

We started on our yearly review of Firefly. Sometimes we watch the whole series more than once a year. Man alive, even though I know every episode by heart, I still love the series so very much.

Last week I was supposed to start a new program of awesomeness or whatever I was calling it, but it's for sure starting this week. I've been advised by my trusted advisor, Craige, that maybe my initial plans were a bit much and I should start slower. So slower is what I'm going to do. I do everything Craige tells me to do, which is remarkably easy since she pretty much never tells me what to do.

I have a full week of productivity, awesomeness and fun ahead of me and because of that I am going to bed early! Two nights in a row of a decent bedtime. Thank you, Fall Backwards time change.

Love,

Catie

The Zig. The Zag.

I realize that I should probably write descriptions for these photos I post.

This is a fence in Yosemite National Park. I liked the lines.

Dear Kittens,

It should not come as a surprise to you Kittens that I sometimes keep secrets from you. Not for the joy of secret-keeping, but more because you are Kittens and just babies and do not need to know everything about everything. It is out of love that I keep these secrets. You can thank me later.

This is the part where I tell you that I've known about the destination of our anniversary trip for a couple of weeks now. I sort of guessed it immediately, but my guess was confirmed when I was looking through the American Express statement looking for suspicious charges. The airline tickets were listed with their destination. I didn't say anything because, you know, when you plan a surprise for someone, you would like for them to be surprised. Finally, 2 nights ago, Andy told me and I admitted that I already knew. It's not that big of a deal, but I am sorry that the surprise got ruined. I'm looking forward to this trip, but I admit I'm a tiny bit tired of travel. There! I said it! I know for sure it will be good and I'll be so glad we did it (did I already say all this?), but after this trip, I'm pretty much planning on staying home A Lot.

So, we're going to Portland, Oregon and Vancouver, Washington. I'm looking forward and I hope the weather cooperates. We've decided to come up with indoor and outdoor activities so we're sure to have a good time no matter what the weather is doing. 

There are ideas for blogs I've come across in the last 2 days that I love. One is an encyclopedia of your home. Based on a book that I love called Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life by Amy Krouse Rosenthal, Elizabeth of A Browner Brown is doing it. It's one of those ideas that you (and by "you" I mean "I") wish you had first. That won't stop me from copying her, though.

The second idea is from Zena. She's taking at least a month's worth of daily photographs of the things that bring her closer to her spirituality. The Sacred Life Project. That might be a tiny bit too hippie for me, but I love the idea of taking a small moment each day to recognize the beauty around you and to find inspiration in something simple.

I find such inspiration from these two ideas that it sort of kills me a little bit. Mostly because I am trying to be smarter about making commitments, I'm not sure which idea I actually have time for right now or if they both should wait until a later date.

I realized yesterday that I've been sort of stalled out in progress lately. I'm still having sessions with Life Coach and they continue to be very good and helpful and generally speaking I feel very happy most of the time. Also generally speaking, I feel like I could be Doing More. I think I need to start pushing myself to go a little bit deeper in this whole personal growth thing. Mostly I think I need to turn up the exercise a notch and the productivity on my creative endeavors. One really good thing that life coaching has taught me is how to follow through. Before life coaching, I was very good about coming up with plans, but not so great at implementing them, but nowadays I feel pretty secure in my ability to make things happen for myself.

Also, I think this is another reason why I am less than Totally Excited for our trip. I feel like there are things to be done at home and being gone so much is preventing me from gaining momentum and that's frustrating. Because, it's not just the actual travel. I don't know if most people are like this, but I find travel wholly exhausting. The whole process of figuring out what to pack, how to pack it, going to their airport, stressing about security and then the actual flying and settling in and then coming home and the being tired and endless laundry and loving the cats and trying to get my schedule back on track and GAH! It takes up a tremendous amount of space in my head. I cannot say that I love travel. In fact, I do not love travel. Seeing new places is a lot of fun and the almost always seems worth it (Sorry, Florida, except for the Everglades, I hated your guts.) but the process is something that wears me down.

And now my day must begin with sort of a running start because we're leaving tomorrow evening and so you know, that's not that far away.

Love!

Catie!

Swing Low

Dear Kittens,

I got some sad news today.

My sister's grandma died on Tuesday. She was a kind and loving woman with a generous spirit. Her entire adult life was spent taking care of her large family. A few years ago she was diagnosed with thyroid cancer and then shortly after that colon cancer. She went through surgeries, rounds of chemotherapy, medication with odd side effects, with the most amazing positive attitude. Recently her cancer metastised to her liver and it was clear that her time left was short. She knew her end was near and she met it with such grace. She died peacefully at home and while her death wasn't a surprise, it still leaves a hole in the hearts of everyone who loved her.

When my parents divorced, they both remarried pretty quickly and I was very lucky that in those new marriages I gained a sister and two new sets of grandparents. I was welcomed into each of those families with open arms. Of course as a child, it would never occur to me that anyone that would ever not love me, as a grown up I realize I was very fortunate because I managed to get through my childhood without ever doubting my people's love for me. And my sister's grandma was a huge part of that. I spent many happy days playing in Grandma Faith's house and experiencing her fierce hugs. When I was 19, I had a major falling out with my dad and she was the one who encouraged me to mend that fence. She wrote me a heartfelt letter, sharing her own difficult relationship with her dad. Of course, the whole thing with my dad did not eventually work out, but I'm glad I took that advice when I did.

My sissy (Geneva) is grieving. Please send her love through my comments.

Love,

Catie

Grandma Faith will surely be hugely missed. 

There! I said it.

Dear Kittens,

I did not mean to let so much time pass inbetween posts. I don't know what happens sometimes. The stories are there, I just don't write them out. I'ma list it out so we get to everything. You guys know that you can click on any of my photos and see larger versions, right? Well now you do.

1. I went to my mom's class for the first time this school year. She's got another lovely set of kids. A little while ago she had a horrible bunch and it made her life so miserable. The nice thing about this group and last year's group is that they're fairly creative and so doing crafts with them is a lot of fun.

2. For the last several months Roo has gotten into the habit of meowing very loudly for me to get up and turn on the water in the tub to the perfect amount of trickle. And then sit on the toilet and keep him company. It's been going on for so long that my body had been trained to need to go pee at 5 am. A full hour before I want to be up. Andy finally decided to get a kitty water fountain that simulates a faucet. HAHA. Roo wants nothing to do with this "kitty water fountain" and had turned up his assholery to a whole new level. Instead of making him go cold turkey, I'm weaning him from the tub water. Today I put a fresh bowl of water into the tub. The best thing is that he kept looking at the bowl of water, then at the faucet, then at me. Like. "what the fuck do you think you're up to?" He did finally drink and I admit to feeling a small triumph over the smallest member of the family.

3. My sister came down over the weekend and we did Catie's Girly Package of Fun. Which means manicures and pedicures, lunch and shopping. We were celebrating her birthday a little early. It was a lovely day and I'm so glda that we got to do it. I meant to take photos of our Girly fun, but I didn't. 

4. I've been doing a number of paper crafts lately. It's all in an effort to spark my creativity to finish my line of Christmas stuff for my business. This year has been particularly frustrating for me because, Kittens, the ideas just are Not working out. My dead line is Oct 20th (set by me), so I really need to get the show on the road and what not.

5. I should write about my family history. I worry about you Kittens getting confused.

6. This weekend we're going to Yosemite. We're staying in a hotel just outside the park, at the south end. We're celebrating my mom's 60 (!) birthday. When I was a kid we went to Yosemite every year in the fall. The last time we went was when my parents were camping there for 2 weeks and we visited them one weekend. During their camping vacation they had a bear peel down their truck door and steal some food AND there was an earthquake. That was something like 10 years ago, so we're long overdue for a visit to Yosemite.

7. So, my mom is turning 60, which means I am turning 40 and neither of us are particularly thrilled about the whole thing. I remember HER 40th birthday like it was just a few years ago. My grandpa died 5 months before her birthday and in total Grandpa Geoge style, his dying wish was that we throw a surprise birthday for my mom's 40th. So my grandma, her sister and Danny and I planned a surprise party for her. She was surprised and deeply touched by everyone who showed up to celebrate with her and she also let me know, in no uncertain terms, that there would never be another surprise party. And so, you know, there has not. Instead we go on trips or have tea parties and go shopping for antiques.

8. When people talk about cats being aloof and self sufficient- I know immediately that this talking person has never had cats. We have three cats, none of them are aloof or self sufficient. They all need huge amount of affection RIGHT! THIS! SECOND! and while I believe Petey and Seamus could keep their bellies full by hunting, Roo cannot. Speaking of hunting, there was a dead, headless baby squirrel on our walkway yesterday. When I asked Seamus what happened to the head, he said he had no idea what I was talking about. I'm pretty sure he's lying. Petey is absolutely my kitty boyfriend. He loves me so much, neither of us can barely stand it. In fact, as I sit in this chair and type, he is on top of me mushing my boobs and then my stomach and looking up at me wondering how I can continue to type with a fluffy black love machine on top of me. Seamus is more like a massage client. A few times a day he comes around looking for a particular amount of love, but he does not give love. Seamus believes his orange stripy presence is enough. Roo is a tiny furry human. Bacon and shrimps are love to Roo. And Andy. Roo loves Andy so very, very much. (Not in a gay way, though)

9. I'm participating in a group on Flickr where you take a self portrait every day for 7 days. I've been having a very good time playing around with my photo editor and even though I fully admit to such when I post my photos, there are members of this group who do not bother to read descriptions of the photos and so they're all- Your eyes! Dudes- my eyes and dare I say, nobody's eyes, are that color! C'est Impossible!

10. Do you feel updated? You LOOK updated. I do my best to be better this week with the updates.

Love, Love, Love,

Catie 

Breeana turns 13

Dear Kittens,

The whole reason we went out on the lake this weekend was to celebrate our niece's 13th birthday. Long time readers will remember when I would call her Miss Banana Face because that's how she said her name (Breeana Faith). For a long time she was my sidekick as we roamed the mall, bookstores and parks around San Jose. Once she started school, I would pick her up on Tuesday afternoons and we would hang out. In those days Breeana would talk and talk and talk and talk and man alive it could make a person want to drive into brick wall. I made the rule that there was no talking in the car unless she was bleeding or getting ready to die. On her own accord she started raising her hand in the back seat whenever she wanted to say something. We would make eye contact in the rear view mirror and she would say, "but Aunt Catie, I just have something I need to tell you". Which, you know, is cute, but I stuck to the rule mostly because she's very wiley and if you gave her and inch she would take 14 miles.

When we would get to wherever we were going she would tell me whatever very important thing she had to say. Breeana struck up conversations with anyone. For a long time they started like this, "Hi, my name is Breeana. B-R-E-E-A-N-A." Back in those days she had issues saying her R's and she sounded like she had a Boston accent. It's almost hard to remember her talking like that because she self-corrected in kindergarten.

When my sister and her family moved away it took me a long time to adjust to not having Breeana or Jared hanging out with me at least once a week. I was so used to scheduling around them that once I didn't have to do that I kept thinking I was forgetting something important.

She's always been really funny and smart, but nowadays she's got a lot of grace. She's super good to her little brother, she's helpful and articulate and curious and really just a wonderful girl. You know, we love her and think we're pretty lucky to have someone like her in our lives.

Love,

Cate 

Dear Kittens,

If you are new to this blog, you will notice that I use a lot of numbered lists in my writing. I also go from subject to subject without warning. Stay close, you don't want to miss a thing.

I do not understand Daylight Saving Time or Standard time or why we switch or why when we switch has been changed. Alls I know is that I'm ready for the time to change back because at least for a little while, it would mean that I wasn't taking my walk in the dark and that would be good.

Yesterday a woman came to the door passing out flyers for missing kids. Talking about how many children were kidnapped every year and look at her badge, which proves she's authentic. I ended up looking at the badge for a really long time and thinking that the badge meant she had a badge. Not that she truly belonged to any sort of organization. When I said something to that effect she was startled and didn't really know what to say. Then I really lowered the boom. I told her that I didn't buy into this whole "kidnapped" kid thing and while there was no doubt in my mind that these kids had undoubtedly been taken from one parent by another parent, to call them "missing" or talking "kidnapping" in a way that suggests that every day millions of children are snatched up my strangers is wholly irresponsible and that I would never support an organization who did that. She sputtered for a second and then left. I should definitely stop answering my door during the day.

Saturday my sister and her family are coming over so we can celebrate Breenana's 13 (!) birthday on the boat. We're going to the lake for some zooming around and then we're coming back to our place to do a Mexican style grill. I'm looking forward to it all.

Every year since we've had the boat I think it would be awesome if we took the boat out on the lake in the fall. Mostly because I think it would be beautiful and peaceful. I'm realizing now that we don't ever end up doing that because fall turns out to be an exceedingly busy time of year. Already October is completely booked.

I just reminded myself of something funny. A very long time ago Andy and I were in Rhode Island with my parents at a dinner celebrating Andy's sister's first marriage. The new in-laws wanted to come over to Andy's parents house for breakfast the next morning and my mother-in-law was hesitating agreeing. She wanted to sleep in, they wanted to get going early- it was a dilemma. So my father-in-law says, "Yes! Come for breakfast. It will be good." And my mother-in-law shoots him a look like, "WTF, Homey?" And then, in a fit of pure genius, my father-in-law turns to Danny (my step-dad) and says, "You (meaning the man) must set the tone (with the little woman)." And everyone who heard it started laughing so hard no one could breathe. A little bit you have to know my in-laws to appreciate the ridiculousness of such a statement. Ever since then it's become a joke in my family.

In closing I would like to tell you that Andy and I have put ourselves on an allowance schedule. It hasn't been fine tuned yet, but we're using those Visa Buxx cards designed for teens, to dole out the money. We decided that our allowance money would be for "non-essentials". This descision has meant there's all manner of dicussion over what is the difference between essential and non essential items. We're defining what is non-essentials for ourselves, but it's been pretty jokey lately about what counts and what doesn't. For right now all my regular skincare stuff and basics of makeup are essentials. Extras like new lipsticks and eye shadows are not. Books and CDs are non-essentials and however sad it makes me to say this, so do shoes. Unless I'm buying a new pair of shoes to walk in, that is. Haircuts are essential, manicures and pedicures are not. And so on until it makes you feel like crying.

Now it's time to finish up designing the Christmas cards I plan on selling this year. Yesterday was a very bad card day. None of my sassy ideas ended up working out. It's very annoying when that happens.

Love,

Catie